Year of the Dog

Happy Chinese New Year friends! It is the year of the dog, meaning those born during this year and others under the canine sign are "loyal and make good leaders." This insight inspired me to read up on my Chinese astrological symbol, the snake. According to one website, I am "slightly dangerous and disarmingly smart--the Snake's philosophical and intuitive mind generally supersedes logic in favor of feelings and instinct." Somewhat true. But they also say I'm jealous and full of myself because of my stunning beauty. Not so much in agreement with that part. If there are any "cock" or "ox" out there--give me a holler. We're supposed to be quite compatible. Much of this reminds me of the fortune teller I met in Bangkok. For about five dollars, I had a half hour reading of my star chart (determined by my date and time of birth) and tarot cards. Although I didn't buy into the cards, I did find the chart reading quite interesting. The stars say that 2006 will be a good year for my health, career and finances. Good because I have to find a job this year and start paying off student loans in 07. I am also going to be married by the end of 08, to someone I know through school. He will be tall and a lawyer, doctor or teacher. He will also "think too much" and "talk about the same thing over and over" whatever the hell that means. And if I have children, I will have three. Now that's a laugh. At my current rate of reproductive opportunity (null) I will be birthing the final kid at fifty. Not pleasant. The fortune lady mentioned a few other things that could be easily said about anyone. But she left me thinking after quite confidently saying that I was very sensitive and unusually emotional, felt great sympathy and pity for those around me and favored the color blue above all others. Accurate, no? So maybe the Asians have something going for them with this animal year and star chart.

Rockstar Zit Kit

This is my unofficial name for the treatment program Dr. P has assigned me. I went to the medispa on Friday and had Levulan and Blue Light, a combination therapy for acne. It is now Tuesday and my face is still super itchy, flaking and pink. However, I hear this combo is amazing and the pictures I've seen of before and after are pretty convincing. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, both for luck and to prevent me from scratching my face off.

The Game

I heart bargain shopping. Anyone close to me knows "the game," that I insist we play after a good day of cheap finds. Today, we will play a mild version of the game.

Background: I have unusually large feet (size 11) and it is difficult for me to find shoes, especially specific colors and brands. So when I find what I'm searching for and it's on sale, I become very giddy and force the game on loved-ones.

I've been wanting a pair of off-white casual shoes since I saw my shoe-whore metrosexual friend (shout out to JF) sport a similar set. I found what I wanted on the Nordstrom website, as they usually carry women's shoes in size "gargantor," but the price for my budget-minded self was steep--eighty-four bucks! That's like, five hours of spa treatments in Thailand!! I gave up. That is, until I saw the identical pair at The Rack for less! And a smudge on the leather counted for another 10% discount at the register! And here goes the game...

I approach you with glassy eyes and a shopping bag...
Me: GUESS what I paid.....for THESE!
(I show you the goods)
You: Um...so if the original price was $85, you got them for $75?
(Good players of the game always start high)
Me: NO!!! Lower!!!
You: Ok, how 'bout $65?
(Going down in five or ten dollar increments is smart)
Me: NO!!! Even LOWER!!! (I begin jumping up and down with excitement)
You: Wow. Maybe $50?
(Signs of disbelief by the player are always appreciated)
Me: Better...!
(I am now clapping my hands)
You: $45 AT LEAST!!?!
(This is where you begin to think no merchant could possibly sell something for this cheap)
Me: Ha ha! Guess again!!
(I am frothing at the mouth)
You: Fine. This is crazy talk. $35....my last offer.
(You shake your head like I've lost my mind and am telling stories of madness)
Me: NO!!!! Thirty bucks!!! Can you BELIEVE IT??!??
(I shout this out as if I am announcing the birth of Christ)
You: Shut up. No way. That's crazy. Thirty dollars for THOSE? But they're so CUUUUTTEE!!
(You are in shock...)
Me: I KNOW!! How cool is that???
(We hold hands and do the happy dance...)






The Goods!







DIESEL Sneaker (Women)
"Stylish, sporty lace-up boasts a low-profile silhouette, enhanced with decorative stitching. A mix of tumbled leather and suede offers textural interest, while a breathable anti-microbial footbed ensures comfortable all-day wear."

I'd like to thank my mother, the ultimate bargain shopper, for the skills she passed down on how to get cool shit for less. I must note, however, that this does not outshine my prom shoe story and that, indeed, thirty dollars is not all that cheap. That is why I suggested this as a mild version of the game. It's the thrill of the hunt and the fact that I didn't even pay for the shoes anyway--I used a gift certificate. Take that!

Thai Showers

While I'm at it, I thought I'd give the shower scenario too. The showers are electric and controlled by switches and small knobs located on a wall unit. Attached is a hose with a small hand-held shower head. Water pressure and temperature are usually based on whether water is being run in another area of the building and/or if the well is in working order. So far, this sounds like a normal showering system. True, but complications arise when you notice that there is no special area for showering, like a tub or a curtained-off section of the bathroom. You shower right there, with the water flying onto the walls and running down a drain in the middle of the floor. It's a good thing there is no TP, or it would be soaked, or a toilet seat, as it would be water logged too. I learned quickly to leave my towel and change of clothes outside of the door, or they would get a shower.

Your Shitter Questions Answered

There are only a few things about Thailand I won't miss--and the bathroom situation is one of them...

Most Thai bathrooms--or should I say toilets--(don't ask for the 'bathroom' because they'll wonder why you want to take a bath) are "squat" style. They are little more than a hole in the floor with, occasionally, foot pads on either side. There is no toilet paper, but you are provided with a bucket of water (where mosquitoes lay eggs) to cleanse your nether region. If you're smart enough to bring your own TP and don't have to resort to using a) the mystery bucket to splash your parts, b) your own underwear or worse yet, c) your fucking hand [so THAT'S why using your left hand is offensive in Thai culture!!], you still have to carry around your ball of shit-encrusted TP until you find a garbage can, which is just about as rare as a clean lavatory. The Thai toilet experience is debasing, at best, and there is little you can do to avoid it, as most people--especially women--cannot go a full day without a squat. I would entertain you with my own "oops, forgot to bring my own TP" story or the even better, "when in Rome, aka. Sarah and the water bucket" experience, but I have some pride, although it could be argued that too was lost during my 3am shower in a Bangkok airport janitor's closet. I will leave you with a theory I developed, which is the answer to why Thai people only wear long pants, even in the 110* heat--they need the extra fabric to soak up the watery mess they make while...you get the picture.

Note:
-General state of filth
-Hole in floor with foot pads
-No flush mechanism
-Reservoir of water with blue "scoop" (water used to force waste down the hole and rinse your 'areas')
-No sink
-No soap
-No TP
-No dignity

Pictures, Pets, Etc.

Faith added a few more pics to her (our) Thailand blog and updated old postings with new pics as well. Be sure to check it out. In other news, I'm still sick. What the hell? And I have a new pet. Pictures of it (them) are coming as soon as it stops raining. You'll get it when you see...

I have a worm bin!! Tim and Sherri had one and offered to build a duplicate after I had admired theirs. A few hours of babysitting later, this is what I get in exchange--how cool! It sits outside of my door, and next to baby Igor, who has been cut down to size and replanted yet again.














The idea is to feed these worms all your green waste and some paper. They'll eat it, producing "castings," their very expensive and fantastically fertilizing poop. Although you can't see them in this picture, they are under the rotting banana peel in the upper left-hand corner of the box. You can tease all you want, but I'll be the one laughing when my pets' waste turns into a lucrative second career! Ha!!

The Movie with Heath and the Other Dude: Spoiler

Last night I discovered that I can't see "Brokeback Mountain" as planned. I was having trouble finding someone to go along with me. I am not one to make judgments (what, you don't want to see a GAY movie??!), I so accepted each declined invitation with grace. However, when I asked a friend who ALWAYS loves the same films I do, she too declined the invitation with, "No way!" I had to ask. She basically revealed the ending and the implied cause of the, well, "ending," and said she just couldn't watch it. Without giving it away, I will note that my reason for not seeing this movie is the same as why I never saw--and probably never will see-- "Million Dollar Baby;" I would not stop crying for days if I sat through the drama. Sure, it's 'just a movie,' but what happens in these films can and does happen in reality and therefore, is more than 'just a movie.'

What is that?

Last night I was cleaning up the kitchen and noticed a "something" on the floor under my drying rack (yes, I hang my delicates to dry in the kitchen...I'm short on space). It was small mound--about the size of a quarter--of tiny seed-looking things. I thought it was odd, but didn't think about it too much other than needing a damp napkin to wipe it up. This morning, I noticed it was back. Yes, back, in the same spot, only smaller. I can't figure out what the hell it is. I tried to take pictures, but they weren't well-focused. Please don't tell me you think it's a poop varietal, because I can handle bugs but not rodents. I await your hypotheses...

Contagious Narcolepsy

Is narcolepsy contagious? If so, I might have picked it up during my travels. I'm still fighting the urge to sleep while teaching, reading, driving, checking email, etc. My slumber still begins around eight or nine and today I arose at five. There isn't much on TV at that time, so I was forced to be productive and work on revising my Brooks course reader which should have been dropped at the printer weeks ago. Ah well. After six this evening my weekend starts and I can go back to coma stage. If it seems like my adjustment period is too lengthy, listen to the advice a fellow Michigander and avid traveler gave--your body needs one full day to recover from each hour of time difference. So I have two weeks, minimum, to get my head out of my ass. For the sake of my students, I hope it doesn't take that long. But it sure sounds like a good excuse to take my sweet time acclimating! A few more pics from better days...

NYE--Rockin' out to the Thai reggae band around 11:30pm!! Like the hat?? It's tissue paper and I think I sweat through it...















NYE--Sarah enjoys a genuine pineapple drink, and, much to the embarrassment of her peers, tries to eat the leftover fruity flesh on the inside...

I'm Back!

I have returned! Thanks to those of you who checked out my other blog and left comments. It's amazing how little notes from strangers and loved ones can make your day when traveling in a non-English speaking country. In a nutshell, Thailand was amazing. I plan to create an ofoto account to post all the pics with some narrative. If you're interested, let me know so I can add you to the invite list.

I'm having some trouble getting acclimated to the time. But, now that I'm at day three, I think I'm on track. I slept most of the night and am not too tired right now. I'm getting hungry at normal times--not four am--and am adjusting to the sight of other white folk. However I have a horrible sore throat and am dreading going back to reality--ie, teaching. I need a vacation from my vacation.

On a side note, I was checking out my site meter to snoop and figure out who is reading my fairly lame-ass blog. I am very curious to know who my Virginia "senate.gov" fan is... Care to unveil yourself? :)